The Villa

Many of you have asked me what the heck I am doing up here, and I can't really answer that definitively yet, but others have wondered if I plan to stay for a while and a few have asked if there will be a guest room if I do stay.

OK, I think the answer is evolving as YES.

It happened this way....My guest house, the venerable Pa Phai, is a very old and charming building which is falling apart more decisively every day, due to the inexplicable and total neglect of the present lessee, and the staff are scared that they will soon lose their livelihoods and homes if the Tourist Commission shut it down due to non-payment of taxes. Two years are owed at the moment.

So I toyed with the idea of taking over the place, but after due consideration and some terse advice from a well-known Mr.Big of the Toronto property scene, I have stepped back from this rash course and have undertaken to lease a little house by the Mekong which I will renovate and where I will live for part of the year, hopefully visited frequently by as many of you as possible.

My "son', Sommay, will live there and manage my affairs here, his pal Joy will be my Guard and all-round handyman, and Joy's sister, Me, will cross the river in a little boat from her village and do the cleaning and washing and tend the veggie patch we will have in the dry season when the river recedes.

It will cost a fraction of what it would cost to do the same thing in Brisbane and will be lots of fun, especially around 5 PM when the sun goes down in a big red ball over the Mekong and we sit on the big verandah I am having built with G&Ts clutched in our fists.

Various other boys will hang out there and sleep there and look after me, living downstairs in the huge main room, dining room and kitchen and I will have several little rooms upstairs including a spare room an office and a bedroom, which will open onto the aforementioned verandah.

I will provide them with a home, small monthly salaries, computer access, English lessons and basic food and they will call me Mum and take me places on their motorbikes and teach me Lao.
Tomorrow we get the architect's drawings, Wednesday we get the builder's quote, and Thursday we will sign the contract and take the plans for permission from Unesco to make sure i'm not creating a World Heritage eyesore. Then we pay some body a small "fee" and hope the permission comes through in a week or so.

Then we build, hopefully finishing the majority of the work before I come back to Oz.

The expat community are all buzzing with the news and promising to come for the housewarming. Given the proclivities of most of them it will be loud and long and a screaming success. Some have threatened to come in drag, which should be a thrill for my new neighbours.

So it's not time to start packing your sarongs and your immodium just yet, but this is your official invitation.....Oh, you may need to practice your Asian toilet technique and limber up your knees as I'm not sure just how far the budget will extend....But there will be a real shower and it will be hot, not just a dipper and a cold tap.

The house will also be the headquarters for The Bamboo Village, the non-profit I am starting to funnel contributions to my various deserving folks over here. The name is a tribute to the extraordinary universal building material and to the incredibly resourceful Lao villagers who use it for a million things, often creating ingenious and beautiful tools and utensils that say a lot about the essential aesthetic here.

OK, I'll stop waffling and let you get on with finding your atlases and your passports.